Welcome, fellow seekers of transformation! Today, we embark on a thrilling exploration into the depths of self-discovery and empowerment. Our journey centers around identity and behavior, unlocking the secrets to profound and lasting change.
To make lasting change we need to change our identity, because our identity is guiding the habits we choose. Our identity is based on what we truly believe about ourselves and the way we see ourselves. If we believe that we are always stressed, our mind will find ways to keep us stressed. If we believe that we can manage stress and that it is just there to help us with a challenge, our body will act accordingly.
Our identity is like a cookie cutter, that creates a certain outcome. When we change the form of the cookie cutter, we will create a different outcome. To understand better, how our identity is formed, let’s take a look at the different layers of identities.
The 3 Layers of Identity
The first layer is the identity based on the culture we are surrounded with. It is created by the environment you grew up in, the beliefs the society holds and how the people around you think and behave.
For example, imagine you live in a society where people brag with their 80 hour work weeks, anxiety and the number of burn-outs they have had. Working long hours and not caring for your own well being seems to be the norm and the expectation, so you will start doing this too. Even if you know it’s not beneficial, you still want to fit in and not be considered lazy for having other priorities than work.
The second identity is the borrowed identity. This identity is based on our life experiences. The different events that have happened during our lives have shaped the person we are today. Different experiences lay the foundation of the habits that we have and how we see ourselves.
For example, imagine that when you were young, you had to have a presentation in front of the whole school. And in the middle of the presentation, you just went blank. You froze, forgot everything you had rehearsed and quickly ran off the stage to go hide in the locker room. From this experience, you might have learned that you cannot speak in public and that you are terrible at it. Your mind will remember this incident and try to do anything to prevent you ending up in a similar situation again.
The third layer is our true identity, who we are at our core. On this level we are able to surpass the external influences and focus on our genuine self. If we want to shift our identity, we should peel back the first two layers and focus on the third.
The first two identities usually are the ones that are the root for our limiting beliefs and unwanted habits. It is the boxes you (and others) have put you in and the labels you have been limiting yourself with.
Let Go and Rewrite Your Story
To shift your identity, you need to learn to recognise what are cultural and borrowed identities and break those beliefs that do not serve you. Then dig deeper into your true identity and start writing the story you want to tell yourself.
By shifting your identity you create new habits and outcomes, and these habits and outcomes strengthen your new identity.
If you enjoyed this post drop a like and subscribe!